Wednesday, April 14, 2010


I know God has many faces and names throughout the world. I respect that concept as do I respect each human's right to believe and worship in any manner they feel most appropriate. I also respect the right of each person to modify their beliefs throughout their lifetimes as they grow, learn and become enlightened. For many of us, religion was something that was introduced to us as a child and what we learned was what our parents felt we needed to know of God and the mysteries of life and death. We were expected to accept those things that couldn't be explained because "God works in mysterious ways" and "when God closes one door, he opens another". Questioning God was not permitted and if a person harbored any doubts, that person was expected to do so in silence. God wasn't an issue of debate! Some people developed a deep faith and it has given them great comfort at times of sorrow and loss throughout their lives. Some people believe God answers prayers and that He never turns his back upon the faithful. They believe He never gives anyone more than they can handle. Those people seem to be able to accept anything that happens without questioning it. Unfortunately, I am not one of those people!

I have to admit I have gone through my life "exploring" various religions without finding one that fits. You see, I have always fallen short of allowing myself to believe in a loving, merciful God who destroys cities and allows some of his most faithful to parish in pain and suffering. I have no problem believing that some greater force than myself is responsible for life as we know it, but I'm afraid that my beliefs fall short of giving credit to some supreme being for the acts of Mother Nature, epidemics and the other major boo boos of the world. I've really tried to envision some omnipotent, omniscient being sitting plugged into a gigantic database that controls all things everywhere throughout the entire universe and it quite frankly blows my mind. I know what the religious people out there will think and say. Trust me, I'm not writing this so any of you will leave me mini sermons on the virtues of Christianity and the need to be saved. I'm just having a hard time watching the news these days and believing that God is alive and well and living on the same planet I call home.

Gratitude statement: I am grateful for being able to remain open-minded and to find the strength to question what I feel needs to be questioned.

All gibberish within ©2004-2010 Mildred Ratched Memoirs.


  1. Whoa I thought there would be lots of comments on this one! Well you know me! I do have a deep faith in God.And I'm not ashamed to say it. I say THAT because I think there are alot of people who are. Without sounding preachy....:) You know God is alive when He lives in your heart....I for one am thankful for His mercy to this world we live in and His forgiveness to me....Love as always your openess and nonjudgmentle additude....Your friendship means more to me than you will ever know.

  2. In some ways it depends upon how you define God. It is certainly reasonable to assume that this planet was seeded long ago by a very smart alien, who being much more advanced than us would seem God like, but who could have died many millions of millenia ago.

  3. oh, fuck the ass...sans lube.

    bring it on god squadders!

    do you believe I was once a Sunday School teacher. Yeah, wrap your mind around that one.

    Sorry. what I meant was, God is Great. God is Good. Let us thank Him for our food. Blah blah blah. Yada Yada. In Jesus' name we pray. Amen.

  4. Margie, we have some thick roots there, kiddo... afterall not many people can say they're still friends with someone with whom they got expelled from 6th grade. Geez, I still can't figure out why you were always getting me in trouble! I'm sure glad at least one of us finally straightened up!

    Dear Anonymous God: The devil made me do it!

    Laoch, yep, some smart alien spread his seeds here and then over time we all got dumbed down!

    Jnuts...he lives! Wow! That's some confession and mine to you is that not only was I a girl scout leader, but I was a Brownie leader as well. Amen!!!

  5. I don't think they have Campfire girls here in Pensacola...So how did you get wrangled into being Sunday school teacher?

  6. hohoho - as a doctor, I sometimes play God.

  7. Mildred: I wasn't actually wrangled. I was young, still under the influence of the big guy in the sky...and my mother, who felt that if I couldn't devote 2 hours each week to church, I didn't really need to do fun things during the week. When an opening arose, I felt it would be points with God AND my mom. Little did I know how truly horrible young children can be. I had second graders. Nasty, spoiled rotten little bitches, all.

  8. Ur-spo, that's cool just as long as you don't "play" doctor.

    Jnuts, and to think we were once second graders, also...were we nasty, spoiled-rotten, little bitches too? NAH! I was good until I got corrupted (I know you believe where I'm going with this) around the age of 11. Now, I have "old friends" who read my nonsense every now and then and they might have a little different memory of the corruption thing, but it's late and if I want to say I was corrupted, then screw it...I WAS CORRUPTED! That's my story and I'm sticking to it until I decided to confess.

  9. I love this. You write it so well. I still have a tendency to think of myself as a Christian, but am lapsed and all kinds of open-minded and questioning. I really think the fundamentalist may tell God he has to throw me out of heaven if I get so fortunate as to make it there. That's okay though I am used to being bullied and treated as an outcast. Thanks for being so open.

  10. JoAnn, I'm so glad you decided to write about this topic on your blog. It was well-written and I could tell you had given the topic a lot of thought. You needn't ever have to worry about being bullied or viewed as a outcast around here. We're all just a happy group of misfits, so join the crowd!