Sunday, November 06, 2022

MY DOCTOR'S BEDSIDE MANNER

I was at one of my doctors yesterday for a follow-up (the list seems to be growing longer each day) when my doctor felt the need to tell me an off color joke. He asked me what were the 3 words a woman hates to hear during sex. As he's asking me this I'm thinking, "WTF! Why is he telling me a joke?" I shrugged my shoulders as an indicator to show him I'm pretty clueless. I barely even remember the last time I had sex let alone what I might have hated to hear in the throes of passion. Enlighten me, doctor...PLEASE! QUICKLY! The suspense was killing me! When he said, "Honey, I'm home!" followed by telling me he works til 10 some nights and rarely sees his wife, I really thought WTF. I left his office wondering if I had just been hit on or if it was just his style to break the ice in this peculiar manner. Next time I see him, I'll ask him if he knows why women have such problems with depth perception. When he looks as puzzled as I must have looked, I'll smile sweetly as I tell him, "It's because they've always been told this much |____________________________| is 6 inches!" And for all those who might be wondering....no, he isn't my gynecologist! Believe it or not, he was my pain management doctor and after today I started looking for a new doctor to treat that part of my health care.

*repost from January 6, 2012

30 comments:

  1. Seriously? He told you that joke?!!! OMG!
    But, I gotta tell, you're joke make me smile.

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  2. Ha! Nice.

    I had a doctor once ask me if I was trying to get him in trouble. I wasn't - still don't know what happened to make him ask that - and he WAS my gynecologist. *shudder*

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  3. I'm so glad I'm a bloke.

    Gynecologist *shudder*

    It's a bit odd him telling you that joke, I suspect he was beginning to hit on you. Are you ready to take it to the next level?

    Next time he takes your blood pressure,say something like:
    "Well, you're pumping awfully hard"
    or
    "My, doesn't it get hard"
    and see what happens then.

    PS, Don't forget to bring the Pepper Spray/Mace/CS Gas

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  4. I always have to watch myself with patients; jocular or informal anythings can be bad, even if the intent was sincere. On more than one occasion a patient has given me feedback about something I said/did that was upsetting etc. I appreciate this, for it shows a good relationship strong enough to process these things.
    I hope you can do this with your doc too.

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  5. What a strange comment. He may have just been trying to be funny and lighten the mood, but it still struck me as creepy.

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  6. Happy belated New Year, Karen. Oh, yeah. Fuck doctors. And Urgent Care centers, for that matter. Did I say Happy New Year?

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    Replies
    1. Since the world is supposed to end this year I might do a few things worse than fucking the doctors!

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  7. Well, Karen, my dear: Just checking in and hoping you are alive and kicking. I also hope that the last few months haven't been too much of a suckfest. Stay abnormal, Mildred.

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    Replies
    1. Alive but not kicking...damn back is on the fritz. Abnormal as always, my dear!

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  8. you have been nominated..


    Versatile Blogger Award

    Rules:

    1. Nominate 15 fellow bloggers.

    2. Inform the bloggers of their nomination.

    3. Share 7 random things about yourself.

    4. Thank the blogger who nominated you.

    5. Add the “Versatile Blogger Award” logo to your blog post.

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    Replies
    1. Thanks for the nomination! What logo or have I gone blind along with all my other ailments?

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  9. Shudder. A doctor to add to the list of ones to avoid - which I note reading through the comments you did.

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    1. This was written 10 years ago. I just read a bunch of reviews written about him online by former patients who find him arrogant, think he doesn't listen, he's rude, lazy, preaches about smoking and obesity and is obese and prefers to hear himself talk. None of those things surprise me.

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  10. Well, he did give me a joke for next Saturday jokes.
    The depth perception one is an oldie but a goodie.

    And not knowing the doc, I can feel for him. I can't tell you how many times over my 75 years I've had 'oh shit' moments when I realize I didn't know a person as well as I thought I did let alone the bloggers I've pissed off, mostly females but not all.

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    Replies
    1. Mike, I'm glad I could help out! We all have oh shit moments but I would hope to think someone in the position of a doctor would attempt to minimize those moments.

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  11. Doctors have to be careful with jokes.

    My dad, an Ob/Gyn, had a couple of standard jokes. One was to pat his belly and say, "Yeah, I'm 7months along with a six-pack of Barq's Root Beer!"

    The other was to tell a woman who was expecting a baby, "This will be your second (if it was her first pregnancy), third (if her second pregnancy, etc.), right?" When she would correct him on the number, he'd say, "What, you don't consider your husband to be your first child?"

    He always got laughs with both.

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  12. weird professional behavior. I could not have sat there smiling I would have said, "hey I am uncomfortable with you telling me sex jokes, Could you please refrain and try to remain professional?" That would have gotten me kicked out but better to do that than act like I was okay and he'd do it to the next woman!

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    Replies
    1. I was with my daughter and we both thought he was a lunatic. I just knew he wasn't who I needed as a doctor so I never went back to him. I'm sure many have confronted him to no avail...I just wanted to get out of there because I didn't like his vibe.

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