Thursday, May 31, 2012

UNPHONETICALLY CONNECTED

Getting a true sense of who a person is out here in the blogosphere can be both an easy task or one that's quite difficult at times. People like me who lay it all out there for everyone to scrutinize are probably fairly easy to "read" and get to know. I think most people see me as someone who doesn't feel the need to pretty anything up before throwing it out here to get chewed on awhile before it gets digested and finds its finally resting place in the great blogging outhouse. I think people see that I'm comfortable whether I'm disclosing something highly personal about myself or if I'm just sharing an opinion. But not everyone out here plays by the same rules I do nor do they share the same purpose or motivation for blogging as I have. Some people misuse and abuse this venue as a way to play head games or to be someone they aren't or can’t be in real life. While some of us come across as genuine and sincere, others are anything, but real. Usually after reading a few posts on a blog we deem as worthy to read and revisit, it's easy to be sucked into that person's world. You may even begin to feel as if you really know the person and at times, you can relate to them on many levels through the words they write.

I started blogging on MSN Spaces when Spaces was first created back in 2004. I've seen many people come and go...several will always remain with me and I feel in awe of them and the plethora of talents they openly and eagerly display. Those are the people who have permanently branded themselves into many people’s hearts and minds. I can think of two examples of blogs and their authors who were at opposite ends of the spectrum and who became like the Hatfield’s and the McCoy’s of Spaces. Some thought the two were actually one person, Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, the true dichotomy of man, but on closer inspection one was sometimes in need of a little of Mildred’s special medication while the other needed something a little stronger…restraints and a few good shock treatments.

Spaces was never quite the same the day Jnuts (a name I gave jockfullonuts because his screen name always seemed too long to me) went in search of greener pastures. His special way of spinning a tale often left his readers laughing so hard they felt they might wet themselves or feeling some other emotion equally as intense as the laughter he often caused. Jnuts seductively enticed emotions from each of his readers as he introduced them to his topsy-turvy life in Arizona. He was one of those special people who have many talents...art, photography, writing, just to name a few and he has spent the last several years of his life sharing those talents with all of us. [a heartfelt thank you] He did it all and he did it like no other...well, maybe no other except his archenemy and greatest tormentor, Psychedelic Pariah. I'm sorry Jnuts that I mentioned "the beast". Please forgive me! I almost feel like he may reappear at any moment if I suddenly say his name out loud three times. [PARIAH, PARIAH, PARIAH] Can you see the monstrosity reemerging from his venomous slumber? I can! He sits waiting...waiting...waiting somewhere out here amongst the lurkers and jerks.

Simply saying Psychedelic Pariah was an enigma was like stating the sky is blue. He was a mystery to most and created a persona people loved to hate. The tales he would tell left people in breathless anticipation...always wanting more even when they felt totally disgusted with what they had read. People hated the intricate mind games he played and his lack of needing anyone’s acceptance, yet they still came and read every word he wrote. As his tales grew wilder and more bizarre, people wondered where fantasy ended and reality began. Unlike him, Jnuts didn't push people to the point of insanity. He didn't reel people in only to slap them in the face and throw them back out into the blogosphere dazed and confused to do over and over again. PP was a master at the art of how to properly conduct an abusive relationship and he practiced it every chance he got out with people he felt worthy of his time, effort and attention. Egomaniac? Sure! But every word he wrote was brilliant and I felt a certain perverse void when he disappeared.

There were others...many others and each brings a smile to my face, but not one of these people is someone I actually know in the real world, the blogging neutral zone. Unfortunately, I only see my blogging buddies through their written words. Do their words allow me to see the real person they are? Does each of us see the same thing as we read each other’s words? I suppose I can answer that by asking myself how real any of us are when we share something about ourselves on our blogs. How much of ourselves do we filter into the text we share with others? Is this who we really are? I often wonder if my words give any of you a sense of who I really am?

10 comments:

  1. I'm not sure if your words give me a sense of who you really are. Maybe I read too much into them - or too little. I try to be upfront on my blog. But, honestly, there is a bit of a filter there. I'm not a very trusting person anymore and there are sides of me that few people really know and that probably I will never share with anyone ever again. In real life I seem mostly to get misunderstood anyway, so I wonder if it matters.

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    1. And I am way too open...sometimes I feel as if it's a fault or flaw.

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  2. Your last paragraph 'says it all' - it captures the mystery and wonderment of what it is to be a writer, and what goes into the writing.
    Well said.

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    1. I'm surprised you even left a comment. I'm proud of you for your strength and perseverance.

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  4. Well, you did kind of embarrass me with all that good stuff you wrote about me. I'm not worthy, of course. I feel the same way about you. You know that, don't you?, sister of a different mother.

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    1. Let's just say I know a lot of things and I'll be your sister anytime anywhere.

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  5. or maybe I meant sister FROM a different mother. heh.

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