Monday, August 19, 2013

THE SQUEAKY WHEEL

Ask and ye shall receive and seek and ye shall find doesn't always hold true in real life. A conversation I had with a male 20+ years younger than me the other day was the catalyst for yet another light bulb moment. The young man was lamenting over having to gently let down a female who was interested in having a physical relationship with him. Can you believe it, the brazen tart only wanted to bump uglies? He told me what he said to her as a gentle letdown and I have to admit he was pretty smooth with his rejection strategy. But let's face it, rejection of any kind is still rejection...and who likes rejection? The poor little tart undoubtedly felt bad, but the first thing that crossed my mind as he revealed his plight was "here stands a male who actually turned down sex" and I wanted to know why. I guess I have to admit I've never seen that happen before. I asked him why he wasn't interested and he named several valid reasons without hesitation.

I also have to admit it took some doing to get over the hurdle of being surprised that a male actually exists on this planet that turned down sex. Hmmmmmm! Has my generation raised its sons to have better morals than what we had in The Stone Age? Have males become more sensitive and sensible? Did male children morph as a result of their mothers' trials and tribulations? Wow! Is it possible that roles really have reversed and that females are getting more and more outspoken, assertive and many times, demanding of what they want? No frills sex??? Wham bam thank you sir and don't let the door hit you on your way out? What's next? Women in the NFL?

My mother always told me that the squeaky wheel gets oiled, but those who know me know I rarely listened to my mother. I guess I must have missed school the day lubing the old wheel was discussed. I also missed class the day "it's as easy to love a rich man as it is to love a poor one" was discussed. In fact, I think I missed school entirely too often. My conclusion regarding the fore-mentioned minor debacle is either that this was some sort of cosmic anomaly or that many younger women need to learn what men want before they bite off more than they can chew. They need to learn how others perceive them when they are crude and abrasive. They also need to learn that "no" from a man doesn't mean you're worthless or undesirable. "No" in this instance means you don't meet someone else's set of preferences. Let's face it we all have preferences, right? I think the key to lessening the instances of rejection might lie in the ancient art of communication. You talk, I listen and vice versa. Take the time to get to know someone and you just might be able to learn beforehand that you are or aren't his or her cup of tea. In doing that, a brazen woman might be able to save face and avoid that awkward moment of rejection.

2 comments:

  1. I'm not sure what you are asking. I do know not all men are eager to have a go at a babe just because they can. You need to hang around a more discriminating group of men, Mildred. Since, LOL, moving to a retirement home (bad eyesight can't hurt and my being about 30yrs younger than many here) I have had to turn down several "marriage" requests (in their generation that meant sex)---I am afraid I am a, er, I am str8 forward, "No." "Nope." "Never." "I am gay," "I am about to be married," "You are not my type," doesn't faze them. NO VACANCY

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  2. Diane, that makes two of us...I don't know what I'm asking either.

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