Saturday, May 31, 2014

MILDRED GOES TROLLING

Every now and then you should shake things up and go for the gusto with a little humor.  The following ad is one I was thinking about posting on an online dating site. Match.com claims it's the number one destination for online dating with more dates, more relationships, & more marriages than any other dating or personals site.  eHarmony wants its users to beat the odds and bet on love because their bold, scientific approach to matching means more quality dates with deeply compatible singles that truly understand you. Which site do you think would yield a match right for me?

Hideous-looking, cynical, judgmental middle-aged SWF with terminal PMS seeks emotionally needy man with money for LTR. Age unimportant. Disgusting habits, arrest record, deviant behavior and psychiatric diagnosis a plus. Physical characteristics, location and marital status not important. Personality and intelligence optional. Please respond with financial statement and picture of house.

6 comments:

  1. I suspect that both Match.com and eHarmony call for honesty as a fundamental requirement. And wonder (in my deeply cynical state) whether they would accept this ad (even if its honesty was a given).
    And I am snickering from the sidelines and composing a similar ad for a (possibly) single white male. 'Youth (or the appearance of youth) vitally important. Intelligence (if any) to be concealed. Vital statistics which make me wonder how you stand up a bonus...'

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    Replies
    1. What's the worst that could happen? I get what I ask for? I doubt it'd be any worse than some of my previous relationships! LOL I think I may submit it just to see what happens.

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  2. Well.....they say there is someone for overyone.

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  3. That's a tempting ad. Does talking like a pirate help a candidate's chances?

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