I awoke last night cradled in peace. No, I wasn't dreaming! The stillness of my bedroom created a serene ambience. Although I was still sleepy, I fought the urge to drift back into slumber. I wanted to savor the moment and use it to reflect on the things in life that have brought me the most happiness and pleasure. Some things have touched me briefly, yet intensely while others have become as familiar as the air I breathe.

I've been blessed by having three wonderful children. There were times in my life many years ago when they were the only reason I went them, I found the strength to forge ahead and to believe the hard times would pass and better days were ahead. I believe my struggle, in part, helped show them that giving up was not an option and that with perseverance and patience anything is possible.

Romantic love has graced my life, yet unfortunately it's never been a lasting type of love. A smoldering warmth ignited by certain faded memories whispers to me making me realize the qualities I need and want in a partner are ones that transcend just having great sex. Wit, creativity and intelligence are definitely as pleasurable to me as a great physical relationship. In fact, I would go as far as to say that without those qualities any sex would be rather humdrum.

I have enjoyed long, gratifying friendships with people from all walks of life. I have to admit that many of them have helped broaden my horizons by introducing me to cultural, religious and political diversity. When I close my eyes, I can hear their infectious laughter and see smiles that could light up a room.

I feel thankful that I've experienced the true beauty of a magnificent sunrise and sunset, the sound of a child's laughter, the smell of lilacs in the spring and the feel of crisp autumn air. I've had the good fortune to learn the difference between "hearing" and "listening" and know breathtaking music can truly define a moment. I appreciate the depth of well-written words and admire those who can communicate and share themselves with others through that medium. I applaud the talent it takes to capture a certain ordinary visual essence with color and form and transform it into a masterpiece.

Life is filled with so many awe-inspiring things, yet many people don't take the time to "stop and smell the roses". For them, life is a rat race filled with stress and deadlines. They wear blinders so their vision of the world is narrow. They are cynical, pessimistic and materialistic. Often a person's worth is measured by the socioeconomic class in which they belong or by their physical beauty. They never experience the shear joy of feeling the sun on their face or the wind in their hair. Simple things seem boring and unworthy of merit. Phrases like "the best things in life are free" and "beauty is in the eye of the beholder" baffle these people. Each step along their journey is carefully measured and focused towards a well planned goal. Deviations are not allowed. So as I soaked in the stillness that surrounded me, I silently smiled knowing that better days will come, love will greet me once again and all the things that have brought me joy throughout my life will remain with me until the day I die.

Gratitude statement: I'm thankful that I still believe in the magical things that life has to offer.

All gibberish within ©2004-2010 Mildred Ratched Memoirs.


  1. and therefore you will always be young.

    beautifully said, karen.

  2. It sounds like I've been taking happy pills!

  3. I've gotten caught up and I must say your mind has been a busy place. I've been reading this new blog and smiling a lot . . . though the subject content is serious . . . because I love the gratitude statements at the end of every entry. Those statements are making me more aware of the blessings I should be counting in my own life.
    Thanks for blogging, as you always have, with an openness and honesty that force me to confront myself.

    P.S. Have I mentioned to you lately how much I look forward to meeting you? Thursday, 6PM if you can make it! I'll be the one in white (LMAO).

  4. Wonderful post. I too, appreciate the Gratitude statements. It is like getting the extra surprise in the Cracker Jack box. I have to admit I turned that box over and opened it from the other end more than once.

  5. Racheal, I'm proud of you for preservering and I'll be there to watch you graduate!

    Ur-spo, Mildred has her moments and you're quite welcome!

    Something, I'm glad you like the gratitude statements. They are my way of being compliant to what my therapist asked me to do. She said, "keep a journal, write whatever you want, but each entry has to have a gratitude statement in it." Sometimes that's not easy, especially when I'm having a bad day and I feel 100 years old...I'm grateful I'm still breathing! It sure beats the alternative!

  6. long time friend have said it all well...And my graditude statement would read as.... I'm thankful for reconnecting with 'old' friends, making them lifelong!

  7. I loved this post!
    ps... ima steal those grat statements...

  8. Margie, you're stuck with me...until death do us part!

    Babe, you're welcome to steal anything you want to steal. At first I had a piss poor attitude about the gratitude thing, but I hung in there and have to say that focusing on a positive has been a good thing for me.