I often wonder if my sexual inhibitions developed as a result of my experiences as a child. I also wonder if that's true, what exactly makes one woman a saucy tart and another woman an ice queen if they both share similar experiences. One thing I did learn early on was the art of communication and how crucial it is in bed. I really believe great sex has as much to do with how a person communicates what they want in bed or the shower or in a tent out in the middle of nowhere as it does with sexual technique. Expressing what you want sexually at the right time can be very erotic. What you say or don't say also can be very damaging to your partner's ego.
We also have to keep in mind that since the two sexes come equipped with different tools, it's hard to gauge what feels best when we have no idea how what we're doing actually feels like to our partner. The exception to that is homosexual sex, but the fact of the matter is EVERYONE deserves a little positive feedback when the time is right! "God, that feels great...don't stop what you're doing!" or "Do that harder and faster...or "slower and tease me with your tongue a little" may be like giving your partner a gold star for job well done. Whatever it is you like, speak up and let your partner know. True intimacy starts with the ability to open up and trust your partner and grows with a willingness to try new things to please each other. However, if recreational sex or a one night stand is on the menu then remember more often than not you'll get the equivalent to a fast food meal rather than a 5 course meal. It might be satisfying at the moment, but it's rarely very memorable.
Gratitude statement: Although I've spent the last 5 years celibate, I'm thankful for some very fond memories!
All gibberish within ©2004-2010 Mildred Ratched Memoirs.