Location: A plasma center parking lot.

Me: Sitting in my car watching the people going in and out of the plasma center. A 20-something year old hoochie momma decked out in all the stereotypical bling and attire exits building with her child in tow.

Hoochie Momma: With child in stroller, Hoochie Momma walks back and forth in front of plasma center texting and talking on her bejeweled cell phone.

Child of Hoochie Momma: Bored...hungry!! Child of Hoochie Momma wants Hoochie Momma's attention. Child throws bottle on sidewalk and starts to cry. Child motions for Hoochie Momma to hold him.

Hoochie Momma: Without skipping a beat Hoochie Momma multitasks by retrieving the baby bottle and dumps the rest of the Coke she is drinking into it for her child who appears no older than 2 years old all the while talking on her cell phone.

Me: The desire to slap the shit out of Hoochie Momma dissipates when Hoochie Momma leaves my field of vision.


  1. oh, Hoochie Momma needs a major beat down!!!

  2. Martha, I really think that hoochie was clueless!

  3. vondap, hoochies are like a virus amongst younger females similar to HPV. I hear it causes twerking like motions in the young and breastless wannabes.

  4. did you just reference Miley? Hahahahha. We're old, you know.