Repost from 2011 and edited:From the time we're small children we're taught that growing old is something to be feared, dreaded and avoided at all costs. Just look at what advertising is geared towards! No wonder so may people go through severe upheavals as they reach middle age and start to show signs of wear and tear.
Vanity tells us that as our outer beauty fades we become less desirable in many ways. We see the fate of the elderly and know that someday we will sit where they are. As we furiously diet and exercise to stay fit, is our strife solely for health purposes or is it just a feeble attempt to hold onto our vanishing youth a little longer? Are the botox injections, breast implants or cosmetic surgery another step closer to the fountain of youth or something that society pressures us into considering as a desired partner in the aging process to help us through the mid-life vanity crisis?
Should we focus on the outer beauty and struggle to stay youthful or should we concentrate on the inner beauty and wisdom that comes with age? Shouldn’t we be able to know and feel good that within each of us is the same person we were years ago without feeling self-conscious that the physical part changes? I think I’ll stick with the philosophy "aging is inevitable, but growing old is optional…" That way I can just do whatever feels right for me regarding gray hair and wrinkles, but at 35, I have a few more years before I have to worry about my fading youth. I'm glad to see my sense of humor hasn't declined as my waistline has thickened and my hair has thinned and gotten white along with the myriad complexities of growing older.
Vanity tells us that as our outer beauty fades we become less desirable in many ways. We see the fate of the elderly and know that someday we will sit where they are. As we furiously diet and exercise to stay fit, is our strife solely for health purposes or is it just a feeble attempt to hold onto our vanishing youth a little longer? Are the botox injections, breast implants or cosmetic surgery another step closer to the fountain of youth or something that society pressures us into considering as a desired partner in the aging process to help us through the mid-life vanity crisis?
Should we focus on the outer beauty and struggle to stay youthful or should we concentrate on the inner beauty and wisdom that comes with age? Shouldn’t we be able to know and feel good that within each of us is the same person we were years ago without feeling self-conscious that the physical part changes? I think I’ll stick with the philosophy "aging is inevitable, but growing old is optional…" That way I can just do whatever feels right for me regarding gray hair and wrinkles, but at 35, I have a few more years before I have to worry about my fading youth. I'm glad to see my sense of humor hasn't declined as my waistline has thickened and my hair has thinned and gotten white along with the myriad complexities of growing older.
This is yours truly at 67. My daughter took this photo of me being my normal goofy self at the Beyond Van Gogh, The Immersive Experience this past Saturday August 12, 2023. I look at it and still see the person I was many years ago and to me, that's a wonderful thing.
As I get older, I'm really starting to doubt the cultural attitude that youth is great and aging is bad. My life has grown fuller and happier as I've aged (I'm in my early thirties), and I would never want to return to my unhappy, tumultous teens or twenties. Life seems to be getting better as time passes, so I suspect that my older years will not be something to fear.
ReplyDeleteAhab, you have the right attitude. I've never been a vain person...I guess to be vain one first has to have the mindset of feeling like they have something to be vain about. I must have been cutting class the day they were teaching vanity or maybe it has to do with my upbringing. I was more a Tomboy growing up than a lady. I wanted to be rough and ready instead of dainty and sweet. When you have 3 older brothers who feel it's their duty to teach you stuff like how to fight like a guy and shoot a rifle and actually hit the target, it leaves little room to be girlie acting. There's no way I would want to be a teenager again either. Those years make me roll my eyes and my head spin.
ReplyDeleteI wouldn't want to be a teenager again but I wouldnt mind turning the clock back about 15 yrs or so....The older I get the more beauty I see "IN" others other than the outward appearance. I can only hope they see the same in me...
ReplyDeleteEverything is ephemeral sadly. This coupled with entropy means that all fights against the ravages of age are futile. Instead growing old gracefully seems like the only sound choice.
ReplyDeleteAs a fellow "35" year old...I have to say that aging has taught me many things. I choose my battles much more wisely than I ever did in my youth....looking back on it now, I made EVERYTHING a battle. Now, it's very little. I have learned to enjoy the little pleasures life has to offer. I am also much happier with myself than I have ever been. I no longer look at myself as ugly or fat.....just as aging very well and healthy...with a little winter warmth added! I have to admit to the weight loss surgery and tummy tuck, however. The weight loss surgery left me healthy but still above my goal weight and the tummy tuck failed because of a weak fascia. Still, I am happier with myself than I ever was as a youngster. Looking forward to the Golden Years with all of my saucy tart pals!!!
ReplyDeleteThe picture of the saying on this post is one I proudly showcased on my office wall for 12 years! I still live by that motto!
ReplyDeleteMy philosophy about this (and a whole of things for that matter) is that it isn't wise or constructive to worry much over things one can't do anything about. Certainly I haven't allowed myself to get caught up in the quest for eternal youth. And truth be told, I've always gotten along well with the older folks and in a sense have always thought they are cool, especially the way many of them get to the point of just doing whatever they want and to hell with what anyone else thinks. We pay our dues by overcoming the daily struggle; we should be allowed that attitude after many years.
ReplyDeleteMargie, then I must be really beautiful in your eyes! LOL
ReplyDeleteLaoch, gracefully sounds like a winner! Let me get all my ailments on the aging gracefully page and then I'll be happy.
Linda, what's a little failed fascia amongst friends? I'm looking forward to going the distance with all of you guys, too!
Doug, I think I'll make a great old person since I've always done whatever I want and to hell with what anyone else thinks.
it's amazing that there are so many of us 35-year- olds around here. we need to start a club.
ReplyDeleteand call it what?
ReplyDeleteThe Pathological Liars Club?
ReplyDeleteworks for me.
ReplyDelete2011!!!! I go to your blog often and find myself rather speechless. The words will eventually come, but for now please know you're in my thoughts.
Delete<--- is close to totally worn out and skidding sideways but --- hang on... where's the grave?
ReplyDeleteOOOPS - I think I went into my slide too soon to hit the plate!
I'm going to slide right past the plate into Oz and beyond.
DeleteI yam what I yam, and if others don't like it, oh, well, they don't have to live with me, I have to live with me.
ReplyDeleteAmen, sister!
Delete67?! You're just a kid!
ReplyDeleteAn old kid! lol
DeleteSemi-mature hippie!
DeleteI am MUCH more comfortable in my skin, sagging and wrinkled as it is than when I was a young person. And if I was given the opportunity to go back in time, my early thirties would be as far as I would be prepared to go.
ReplyDeleteThe thought of being a teenager again gives me the grues.
I don't have anything to be vain about, and don't give a rat's fundament. And will not join the botox. plastic surgery brigade. Or make up for that matter.
On another note, I loved the immersive Van Gogh exibition. I hope you did too.
I did enjoy the exhibition and on some plane, I hope Van Gogh knows he got larger than life.
DeleteI think you look great in that pic! A friendly and outgoing face, and a sense of fun. I would like to be NOT IN PAIN all the damn time, but would not trade my years of experience for it.
ReplyDeleteThanks! Friendly and outgoing is a great thing especially in this crazy, mixed up world. I've lived with pain so long it's like that person you don't really like, but somehow they're around all the time anyway so you grin and bear it.
DeleteThat anonymous comment was mine, for some reason I wasn't allowed to post as me. Hmph.
ReplyDeleteThe cyber gods were messing with you :)
Delete