I just realized something. The thought really did just pop into my head from out in the cosmos somewhere floating amongst the galactic matter that I, Mildred Ratched have gotten old. How this happened I don't quite know. I'm puzzled! Confused! Vexed! Flummoxed! Just good old plain mind-blown. I have become THAT OLD WOMAN who bitches and criticizes and complains. When did I start disliking people so much? Is it everyone that I dislike? Am I becoming a crabby troglodyte again? I'll really start to worry if I feel the urge to paint my bedroom Bohemian Red like my previous "cave" was painted. When did I get old? It seems like it happened overnight. Yesterday, I was young and vibrant and today, I'm The Sea Hag. My body doesn't seem to know what muscle tone and tight flesh means anymore. Things grow where they shouldn't and stuff falls out that I wish would stay put. I'm the female version of Archie Bunker, except I'm more pitiful because I don't have anyone to call "Meathead" and unfortunately, Mildred doesn't have a "Judith" or a "Jack/John/Joe or who really cares"...that is, unless one of you dear creatures want to fix me up so I'll have someone of my very own to love, honor and abuse. I'll bring my own recliner and remote control, of course. Geez! It sounds like a righteous deal to me and on a good day I might even cook a meal. What more could anyone dream for or expect from a relationship?
Some days I seriously startle myself when I catch a glance of myself in the mirror. I'm never expecting to see someone who looks so old looking back at me!
I am (mostly) enjoying being a Grumpy Old Woman. It has taken a very long time for me to be more or less comfortable in my own skin (even though it no longer fits).
You're hilarious and I can certainly relate. Tho' I see nothing wrong with painting your Room Bohemian Red of coarse, at any Age. I guess as we Age we care less what people think, not that I cared that much as a Younger version of myself, but now I truly am at that I Don't Give A Shit Phase of Life. I do like the privilege of growing old but the changes are evident and sometimes they really do baffle me too since I don't FEEL OLD on the INSIDE either.
Bohemian Red is a terrific color, but for me painting my room a dark color instead of something bright and cheery makes me feel like I'm in a cave. The picture of B.A. one of my dogs has the bacjground of my old bedroom walls.
Some days I seriously startle myself when I catch a glance of myself in the mirror. I'm never expecting to see someone who looks so old looking back at me!
ReplyDeleteI know what you mean!
DeleteThe same phenomenon has happened to me? I agree with you, Mildred -- WTF is going on?
ReplyDeleteWell, if you figure it out please enlighten me! PLEASE!
DeleteI am (mostly) enjoying being a Grumpy Old Woman. It has taken a very long time for me to be more or less comfortable in my own skin (even though it no longer fits).
ReplyDeletelol...skin that doesn't fit! Now, there's an image burnt into my brain.
DeleteI began my misanthropic adventure at age 40. :-)
ReplyDeleteI wish I could have froze at age 45 :-(
45 is an excellent age. Old enough to know better, but still young to enjoy it if you do it anyway.
DeleteOne of the niceties about becoming an old person is you can say anything and be blunt without worry.
ReplyDeleteUh oh! I was supposed to wait to do that until I got old? Oops!
DeleteIt will grow on you, whether you want it to or not.
ReplyDeleteLike a wart!
DeleteYou're hilarious and I can certainly relate. Tho' I see nothing wrong with painting your Room Bohemian Red of coarse, at any Age. I guess as we Age we care less what people think, not that I cared that much as a Younger version of myself, but now I truly am at that I Don't Give A Shit Phase of Life. I do like the privilege of growing old but the changes are evident and sometimes they really do baffle me too since I don't FEEL OLD on the INSIDE either.
ReplyDeleteBohemian Red is a terrific color, but for me painting my room a dark color instead of something bright and cheery makes me feel like I'm in a cave. The picture of B.A. one of my dogs has the bacjground of my old bedroom walls.
DeleteAudra May does forever young the best...I can't get enough energy to give a fuck so even though I am an old crone, I'm not too bitchy.
ReplyDeleteI'll have to check out that version. Thanks for mentioning it.
DeleteGiving a fuck does take energy, doesn't it?