MEDICATION TIME

I know sometimes I ramble on about being alone when in reality, I'm exactly where I want to be. I think I have moments of weakness when I actually do miss having a significant other and then something always knocks me back into reality. Usually, it's someone I know going through some relationship drama that makes me want to vomit and run for cover. At times like those, I feel thankful that my life is without that kind of drama. Unfortunately, my life has other areas that take up the slack. I just read an article today about diabetes and stress. HA! And people think carbs are what kill... First and foremost on my bitchfest for today is my elderly mother. I call her "mother" for lack of anything else to call her. You see, this woman who looks like my mother really isn't my mother at all. The aliens must have abducted her about 5 years ago and put a empty pod in her place. The empty pod doesn't like to do the things my mother used to like to do. In fact, the only activity this pod likes is sitting in the dark and rocking in the rocking chair. 

The pod won't bathe, brush her teeth or eat properly, but when asked about depression, "it" responds that everything is fine. I'm at the point of pulling my hair out because I don't know what to do to help change things. All this stress is effecting my health, but short of installing an on/off switch in my head, I don't know how to just accept the fact that there isn't anything I can do. Believe me, over the past 5 years, I have tried everything known to man to interest the pod in anything and any suggestion I make is met with instant resistence. I even went as far as one day saying to the pod, "Okay we're even!" (I felt she was paying me back for me being such a rebellious shit in my younger years) The pod knew what I meant without any further explanation and it laughed at my frustration! The second bug that has crawled up my ass are people who disappoint me...I know,BOO HOO! I figure at this stage of life meaning "adulthood", people should follow through on things they say they are going to do or else they need to just keep their well-meaning pieholes closed. 

I'm tired of doing things for everyone and in turn, feeling like I'm used and unappreciated. Yes, I know I allow this and need to be a little less giving, but to be honest with you, I don't know how to be any other way. And I really don't think it's me who has the problem! Being able to give to others is an attribute, but the longer I live, the more I see it's an attribute that's taken advantage of by leeches, emotional vampires and other bottom feeders. At this moment I just want to tell everyone to "suck my ass dry!" I NEED DRUGS! NOW! And the sad part is, I'll take a deep breath or twenty and just go about my business. 

Gratitude statement: I'm grateful for being able to tell those around me, the givers of stress to fuck off ocassionally. 

BITCHFEST - PART IV

It's no secret that I consider war immoral. You see, I think slaughtering others is a completely avoidable act and that peace can be accomplished through peaceful means. (Please don't jump in here and give me a rash of shit about what if someone attacks you. Self-defense is an entirely different story. We all have survival instincts and should use them when and if needed!) Wars should be as a last resort and then I'm still not comfortable with the mass annihilation that takes place. I know my beliefs are idealistic, but it's my right to feel anyway I want to feel and believe in whatever I want! If you read the post before this one you can pretty much see where my religious leanings are...I'm all for brotherly love and doing unto others as you would have them do unto you and yes, the Ten Commandments are cool, but that's where it ends for me. I'm sorry, but I'm a "show me" type of person and God has never shown me that he or she really exists. I have a zero in the faith department when it comes to worshipping a deity or deities.

I tend more to go along with Karl Marx and believe religion is the opiate of the masses that gives the down-trodden something to look forward to....death and the here after! Come on! What a crock of shit...it's like the gold stars you give a little kid to bribe them into being good. Okay people, here's your treat....you get to sit in heaven and play harps and sing songs for eternity. I'm sorry if the thought of that being my reward for being good doesn't exactly win me over. Nope, I'm not a puppy in search of yummies and if I do get a yummy I want it NOW. Oh no, I hear praying going on and those prayers are for me. Okay, so if you must pray for me, pray I get a new spine and a BMW. Oh hell, at this point I'll settle for a BMW and a handful of Percocets. Then I can cruise on the highway of life going 120mph and feel on top of the world.

Gratitude statement: I am thankful your God loves me just the way I am.

BITCHFEST - PART III

I posted the anonymous quote found below to my Facebook page and before I go any further let me explain why so many people are on Facebook...mindless banter. That's it! It's a site to "hang-out" and vegetate and to reconnect with old friends. So anyway, I posted this quote about religion knowing that it would stir the pot...and it did! Amazingly enough, most people really missed the whole "if you're gonna talk the talk, then walk the walk" point of the quote. It never ceases to amaze me how defensive people can get over nothing.

I guess those who squeal the loudest must be the most guilty. That whole "I'm in church on Sunday, so I can do WTF I feel like doing the rest of the week and God will forgive me because I'm imperfect and a sinner so I'm supposed to sin" mentality makes me want to vomit. If you're a Christian stop back biting! Stop gossiping! Stop walking past people in need! Stop judging everyone except yourself! Act more Christ-like! And stop sending me fucking religious stuff! If I want to be a hedonist that's just what I'll be because I like pleasure. If I claim to be a heathen, then just go about your merry Bible-thumping way. You can pray for my eternally damned soul, but stop trying to cram Jesus down my throat. By the way, shouldn't a person lead by example and not by "do as I say and not as I do"? If you really want me to see the light, you need to stop giving Christianity such a bad name!

"Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than going to a garage makes you a mechanic."

Gratitude statement: I'm thankful that when I do something from the heart, it's from the heart and not motivated by some fear mongering dogma.

BITCHFEST - PART II

Ex-lovers make good speed bumps.

Gratitude statement: I'm thankful that not all people think like I think.

BITCHFEST- PART I

Remember the good old days of telling a joke to a group of friends? And if that joke was funny, you had the privilege of hearing people's laughter. Now, each time I check my email, my inbox is stuffed full of a few things..spam and jokes from the same few people. Okay, spam is something I guess I can remedy fairly easy, but the other is something I really don't understand and find it unnecessary and quite annoying. I would much rather have someone write a few lines ocassionally asking me how I'm doing than to have this daily barrage of jokes I never even open.

If a person feels the overwhelming urge to forward jokes to everyone in their address book, why do they do it by just hitting the FORWARD option? I, for one don't want the whole world to know my email address. The BLIND CARBON COPY (BCC) option seems to be one of the most underused email features there is. Why isn't the rule of thumb for any joke being passed around the internet that if you wouldn't tell the joke out loud to a group of people then it isn't worth passing along in an email? "LOL" just isn't the same thing as actual laughter. Some things just don't have a suitable substitute like manners, good judgment and laughter just to name a few.

Don't get me wrong! I’m all for passing along a FUNNY joke, but most of the jokes I've had the misfortune to open and read only makes me wonder if the sender ever reads what they send before they forward it to their entire contact list. A little screening beforehand might make the recipients of stupid jokes stop wondering what kind of drugs a person would have to take in order to make these jokes appear to be funny. Come on people! Think about those several jokes you forward to everyone daily and then multiply that by 4 or 5 well-meaning friends and acquaintances who obviously have alot time on their hands.

If I read everything that was sent to me each day and passed it on like instructed so I'll have some stroke of good fortune within the next few minutes, show my loyalty as a friend by sending it back to the sender and to show my patriotism or support to some organization by keeping the chain alive, I'd have to give up the few hours I sleep each night. Perhaps there lies my problem...if I spent more time keeping the chains and jokes going instead of trashing them, I'd be a millionaire now. I’d have friends who know I love them and there would be no question as to where my allegiance lies!!!

It sounds ridiculous when I put it like that, doesn't it? I just find it incredible that people actually pass that crap around without ever thinking about what they're doing. Maybe I'm missing some hidden point and if so, I wish someone would explain it to me because I really don't understand why any intelligent person would forward something like that to all their friends when most people find it to be such an annoying practice. Is this just another one of those delicate subjects that people find difficult to discuss with their friends?

You know, like the person who has bad breath or smelly feet and you back up every time they get close to you. You can't believe the person doesn't realize how offensive the odor is and wonder how they can be so blissfully ignorant to something like that. How do you enlighten a person without hurting their feelings? Many times I’ve sent an email to the guilty parties saying things like "I really appreciate being included in the list of people you forward jokes to on a regular basis, but I'd really prefer just to hear how you're doing every now and then instead." Obviously, my email must have been deleted as spam and never opened because the jokes just keep on coming and coming and coming... For good fortune send this to 5 friends in the next 5 minutes!!!

Gratitude statement: I'm thankful for my sense of humor because it allows me to know when something is funny or when it's just annoying and not worth a chuckle or two.