LIVING WITH CHRONIC PAIN

For the past 20+ years I've lived with chronic pain. Now, I'm faced with having a few new additional pains added to all my other "normal" ones. Several months ago I injured my left shoulder doing yardwork. When the injury happened I knew immediately that I had done something to it, but failed to get it examined until November which was several months after the injury. My rheumatalogist order X-rays of both shoulders and an MRI of my right shoulder. I didn't realize until I went to get the MRI done that the order for the MRI was for the wrong shoulder. The facility wouldn't call my doctor and get a verbal change to the order, so I just went ahead and had an MRI done on my right shoulder.

Shortly after that I got an appointment with my primary care doctor because getting back into see my rheumatologist on short notice isn't an easy feat to accomplish. My primary care ordered a MRI for my left shoulder which revealed a complete tear of my rotator cuff, bone spurs and something wrong with my biceps. After jumping through all the necessary red tape to get cleared for surgery, my surgery was finally scheduled for February 20th. The results of the MRI on my right shoulder revealed tears in my right shoulderas as well.

Yesterday, my surgeon's office called to tell me that my surgery has to be postoned until April 3rd. This delay is due to the biologic (Skyrizi) I take for Psoriatic Arthritis. According to my rheumatologist surgery can safely be done 13 weeks after my last shot. Needless, to say I'm bummed out that the surgery had to be postponed. I was actually looking forward to putting it in my rear view mirror so I could address the other shoulder.

Chronic pain can be one of the most difficult things to accept and learn to live with daily. It can be a constant reminder of our physical limitations, making it hard to stay motivated and keep up with our daily lives and relationships. Pain can also affect our mental and emotional health, creating a downward spiral of depression and exhaustion. Fortunately, there are strategies we can use to help us accept our physical limitations and learn to live with pain. 

It's important to be aware of the signals your body is giving you and listen to them. I failed to do this initially when I first injured my shoulder. I tried to power through it hoping whatever was wrong would eventually heal and go away. It didn't! If you're feeling pain, don't try to push through it. Doing so can lead to further physical damage and more chronic pain. Instead, take a break and find out what is causing the pain. Pay attention to feelings of fatigue or low energy, as these can signal an underlying health condition or depression. Also, monitor your mood and be mindful of your reactions to stress or changes in your environment.

When listening to your body, pay attention to the little things that bring you happiness. Take time to relax, try something new, or just spend time with loved ones. These activities can bring joy into your life and give you energy. Achieving balance between your physical and emotional needs can help you better understand and accept your physical limitations. Connecting with yourself and your emotions will allow you to assess how different activities affect your energy levels and happiness. This may help you become more mindful of any potential triggers for depression or other mental health issues.

Additionally, staying active even if only for short periods of time will boost your energy levels and help keep depression at bay. Taking care of yourself in small ways each day such as going for a walk or reading a book can also contribute to overall happiness. Finally, seeking support from friends, family members, or healthcare professionals can make all the difference when trying to cope with physical limitations. Surrounding yourself with positive people who are understanding of your situation can help you stay motivated and supported during difficult times. 

DAY OF RECKONING

After I get my MRI results (hopefully today), I'm going out of town in a few days on sort of a "spa retreat" (spiritual journey) for about a week or so.  While I'm gone, I'll be off the grid so to speak so I won't be posting anything (no internet access).  Isn't that fabulous to be somewhere these days that claims to be a technological dead zone? I'm actually excited to rough it for a few days.  Anyway, I have some soul-searching I need to do and this all came exactly at the right time when I needed it most. There are things in my life that are out of alignment and since a chiropractor can't help me with these problem I'm left to my own devices. These things that are "out of alignment" I feel them constantly and I can't seem to shove them back into place no matter how hard I try. I know that probably sounds goofy as hell, but trust me on this one that it's not goofy at all. It causes me much mental distress so I'm going to get mentally lubed by people who do this for a living and shove everything back into place and let the rest go into the ozone or wherever negative energy goes.

I AM A MESS

Back along ( I won't say when because everyone will holler WTF in unison) I injured my shoulder and it has progressively gotten worse since then. I can't extend my arm in front of me nor can I raise it above my head. The pain radiates all the way down my arm to my wrist. Getting dressed and undressed is a real challenge. In November my rheumatologist ordered X-rays and a MRI, but when I went to have them done the order was written for the wrong shoulder and the place wouldn't call the doctor's office to get the order changed verbally. Initially, I had a follow-up appointment in December with my rheumatologist which I intended to get the error corrected then, but I got a call from her office and they had to reschedule my appointment for a later date. At that point I called my primary care and got an appointment and was seen quickly. My primary care doctor ordered a MRI for the correct shoulder and it's scheduled for Friday. Given all my symptoms, she thinks I have a torn rotator cuff. Needless to say, I've been in pain most of the time and sleeping is difficult. Sleeping is always difficult anyways, but I feel like I'm in a fog all the time. No, the fog isn't from smoking weed! :) It's from lack of sleep and pain. I'm wondering if the surgery I had in October 2020 that caused nerve damage and muscle wasting syndrome has in some way contributed to this injury and if it will show up on the MRI. I will definitely mention it on Friday and hopefully they can capture that area on the image. So one thing is for certain, I can start 2023 with saying Mildred is a mess!    

THE SAGE OF THE SPIDER BITE

I didn’t quite know what to expect yesterday going into my angiogram. I had a basic concept of the procedure but when I got in the procedure room and on the table, it was like I was in Marquis de Sade’s torture chamber. They started strapping me down to the table where conscious sedation would be used. I guess no wiggling is allowed! So you know me I couldn't resist asking which one of the six or seven people in the room was the dominatrix. OMG! That’s all it took! Those people erupted and off it went…

So the procedure went well, but no blockage was found. They used a device called a mynx to plug my femoral artery to stop the bleeding and I swear they used a sledge hammer to put the mynx in. No joke! I'm sore from my waist to half way down my right thigh. An interesting thing about the procedure is that they go in from the opposite side. The bite is on my left ankle and my whole right side is hurting today. My left underarm even hurts today and I have no valid reason for that. It feels like someone grabbed me hard by the armpit. My right side of my neck feels like it got tweeked somehow. I think they may have had a squad of little kids jumping up and down on me while I was unconscious. On the up side, I get to be a lady of leisure for the next several days. 

Because the doctor found no blockage, he now wants me to have a MRI of the area because he thinks it may be an infection in the bone that’s preventing the wound from healing. I just hope the MRI is a little earier on my body than this was! [lol] So the saga of the spider bite continues…