Showing posts with label lifestyle. Show all posts
Showing posts with label lifestyle. Show all posts

Sunday, December 11, 2022

WHY THE CAGED BIRD SINGS

This post was originally written and posted in 2005 on my original blog, Abnormally Normal People.

The caged bird sings for freedom. It sings as a disguise. It sings because if it remains silent, it will fade away and die. Many times I have tried to place myself in other people's shoes especially those people who feel as if they have to hide or cover up who they really are or conceal the lifestyle they have chosen to live because they fear the stigma and rejection attached to it. I grew up being the black sheep of the family, but even the antics of a black sheep doesn't come close to type of reaction created by someone who is homosexual. I can almost understand why some people try to lead a straight life, be something they are not and never feel comfortable enough to reveal who they really are. The inner turmoil must be devastating. Yes, I know all those who still say horrific things about homosexuality. I've heard all the arguments...all the pros and cons!!! I guess my views on the subject allow me to see the person as a human being and not as some perverted demon or freak of nature. 

Several years ago my mother made a strange statement to me one day. She told me that I had changed her views on homosexuals. Me? I'm straight....how did I do that? She asked me if I remembered the day I first learned that one of my female cousins was a lesbian. I thought back to that day over 30 years ago and remembered what an uproar within the family that announcement had caused. Hey, at the time I probably felt relieved because the focus wasn't on me and the gossip was centered elsewhere! Yes, I remember being told! My mother asked me if I remembered what I said to her when she told me about my cousin. I thought back, but I couldn't remember my initial reaction. 

My mother refreshed my memory by telling me that I informed everyone in the room that my cousin was the same person as she was the day before they all knew she was a lesbian. As far as I was concerned, nothing had changed. My mother said my words stuck with her and she knew what I had said was true. She stopped labeling my cousin and allowed her to continue being the person we always knew her to be. That acceptance broadened in time and allowed my mother to view others with different preferences and lifestyles as being just as human as she is and it made me smile knowing the black sheep can be pretty sagely at times!

Gratitude statement: I'm truly thankful for being able to view people's differences as differences and not in terms of making one person better than another. 

30 TRUTHS IN 30 DAYS - DAY FIFTEEN

Truth #15: One of the most frustrating things in life is trying to be someone you aren't. Take someone who desperately wants to live what they perceive to be as a normal life, but they are completely miserable in doing so because that person needs a little spice, a little wild hair every now and then to feel what's normal for them, but to fit in they go against what their core is telling them to be. My mother always told me "to thine ownself be true" but how far should one take that? I'm not talking about let's all go out and swing from the trees, become serial killers or live out all our wildest fantasies, but what if someone struggles with living a lifestyle that's not meant for them to live. Life is too short to live it being void of any happiness, any satisfaction, any fulfillment. Shouldn't we all find our own path? Whatever that path is? If the beat we hear is a different one, then I think we owe it to ourselves to follow it to see where it will lead us. If that path is down some rabbit hole, then perhaps we should change our name to Alice and just enjoy the adventure.