On my way to a doctor's appointment not too long ago I stopped and took the photo below. The independently-owned gas station that once had done business at a prime location had been rudely squeezed out of business by two convenience stores very close by. I'm sure that's a too familiar story for many small business owners. Now, the once thriving business claim to fame is barbecued turkey legs (not listed on the sign), sweet potatoes, boiled peanuts and an occasional carwash for some local charity or school. You can't get more Southern than that except if they offered ice cold moonshine as a beverage to wash away your cares.
As I came to a stop at the traffic light at the intersection on which this once booming business rests, I did a quick double take. Obviously, either new services are now being offered or some young hooligan rearranged the letters to get some laughs. Yep, I actually circled around so I could take a picture on my cell phone from the parking lot. I have to admit I was tempted to ask how much does it cost to get an "oiled anus" because the price wasn’t listed and after all knowing the price is an important thing especially for those who are on a tight budget. I exercised my almost non-existent self-control by simply driving away with a smile on my face, but only after securing a picture that truly is worth a thousand words or in this case, three hundred and nineteen words.
* Repost from November 30, 2015
Soooo good to see your post. Hurray for Zoloft lol. As for an oiled anus all I can say is would be some smooth BM's....Hahaha
ReplyDeleteMade me think of Olestra side effects, the wonder diet drug that left oil strains in your undies.
DeleteThat's brilliant! I am giggling like an idiot. Too bad about the gas station and store though.
ReplyDeleteGiggling always feels great...glad I was able to do that for you.
DeleteNot the usual body part that needs moisturising (*~*)
ReplyDeleteI kept wondering why there was such long lines at a place that no longer sells gas. I think they offered a discount for those who BYOB (of oil that is).
DeleteSmiling. And can't top River's comment.
ReplyDeleteYou needn't top it. Your smile brightens the whole oil smeared post!
DeleteCan't help combining all parts of the sign from "Parade" on down. How does one combine Regular Plus Diesel with 5 lbs. of sweet potatoes and oiled anus? And when does this parade take place?
ReplyDeleteThat parade would be a real sight for sore eyes! It truly is a difficult vision to get out of my head.
Delete_oiled __anu_s ..... I believe that is a Florida specialty. Bwahaha!
ReplyDeleteOh yes! The next time I go by there I think I'll bring a bottle of extra virgin olive oil with me just in case a wild hair starts to tickle.
DeleteNot sure about your part of country, but out here, oiled anus is free in the summer with a purchase of a large Slurpee (maybe it's the other way around). Winter, its harder to get an oily anus, so the cost is usually a cocktail or two to get the juices flowing.
ReplyDeleteBy the way, photo is priceless. Envy is such an ugly word, but that is my word for the moment.
DeleteComing from someone as talented as you are, that's a huge compliment.
DeleteYou always manage to make me laugh. I want to say THANK YOU because I really needed to laugh today.
DeleteOh, stop it. You are every bit as talented as I. Maybe more so. If I could harness and market your mind, I'd be rich. Or unstoppable...or both.
ReplyDeleteStop making me blush!
DeleteOh! I was just about to delete your link on my blog ( for I am doing some tidy up) when I thought to press on it to hope you were posting when lo! There you are! Brava! Hang in there!
ReplyDeleteHAPPY CHRISTMAS!
I'm glad you didn't delete me. 2016 will be a comeback for Mildred.
ReplyDeletebwhahahahahaha! hope they used good quality lubricant for that anus! welcome back!
ReplyDeleteIt probably was nothing more than axle grease! Whatever gets the job done, right?
Delete"Repost" Is the sign still there? I would anticipate a booming business.
ReplyDeleteMike, unfortunately the sign was taken down pretty quickly once it was discovered by the owners. Can you imagine someone stopping to buy some sweet potatoes and asking for 5lbs of sweet potatoes and an oiled anus? lol
DeleteThe signs around here can be comical at times, but not that comical.
ReplyDelete